Mindful Living in My 40s: How I’m Becoming Clearer About Who I Am
More than ever, I’m realising how much mindful living has changed my life. Creating awareness has done more for me than almost anything else I’ve tried.
In my 40s, I’m focusing on becoming clear about who I am: how I get to know myself, how I speak to myself, and which environments I want to spend my time in. These are the things I’m working on to live more mindfully.
1. Practising mindful eating
I’m slowing down and actually experiencing my food: the flavour, the texture, and the point at which I’ve had enough. This is also the thinking behind my Mindful Meal Prep System. When meals are already prepared, I can sit down to eat without making a rushed decision, and give the food my attention.
2. Prioritising mindful practices
Meditation, affirmations and mirror work all help me build a stronger connection with myself. None of them takes long, but they work best when they become habits. If you’d like to explore any of them further, I talk about them often on my podcast, The Seeds You Water.
3. Spending more time outdoors
Being outside is grounding. Fresh air, slower moments and space to think clearly are all available just by stepping out the door, and I notice the difference in my mood when I’ve had a few days without it.
4. Understanding what regulates my nervous system
I’ve become much more interested in how I self-soothe and what actually settles me. Knowing this helps me understand what I need, and it means I can communicate it clearly to the people around me instead of leaving them to guess.
5. Being clear about my boundaries
I’m learning to protect my energy without over-explaining myself, and to move away from my people-pleasing tendencies. A boundary doesn’t need a long justification. A clear, kind no is usually enough.
6. Developing active listening
Listening well is a skill I value more and more. I want the people I’m with to feel that I’m fully present, and I think that’s one of the most generous things we can offer someone. It takes practice, particularly putting the phone down and not planning what to say next.
7. Letting go of perfectionism
Sometimes showing up is the hardest part. I’m learning that not everything has to be perfect, and that turning up, imperfectly, is enough.
Final thoughts
I’m not trying to do all of this at once, and I don’t do any of it perfectly. But I’d rather spend my 40s getting to know myself than performing a version of myself I’ve outgrown.
Sophie Benbow writes about mindfulness, gratitude, mindful eating and intentional living. Through simple daily practices, she helps people create a more connected, grounded and meaningful life. Explore more articles, guided meditations and resources here on her website, or listen to her podcast, The Seeds You Water.