Understanding Emotional Eating
Most of us have eaten for comfort at some point. A warm bowl of pasta after a hard day, a piece of chocolate when we’re feeling flat, something crunchy when we’re bored or restless. This is part of being human — food has always been about more than fuel.
Emotional eating becomes an issue not because emotions and food overlap, but when eating is consistently driven by feelings rather than physical hunger, and leaves us feeling disconnected, out of control, or ashamed.
Understanding emotional eating isn’t about stopping it altogether. It’s about getting curious about why it’s happening.
What is emotional eating?
Emotional eating is eating in response to a psychological or emotional cue, rather than physical hunger.
That might look like using food:
To soothe or numb difficult feelings
To distract from anxiety, sadness, loneliness, or overwhelm
To fill a sense of emptiness or lack
To create comfort, safety, or control when life feels uncertain
Often, emotional eating isn’t conscious. Even people who feel emotionally aware can struggle to connect their eating patterns with how they’re actually feeling. The behaviour can become habitual — something we do automatically, without pausing to ask what we really need.
At its core, emotional eating begins with emotions. When we haven’t learned how to recognise, regulate, or express what we’re feeling, food can quietly step in and do the job for us.
Emotional hunger vs physical hunger
One helpful way to understand emotional eating is to notice the difference between emotional hunger and physical hunger.
Emotional hunger often:
Comes on suddenly
Feels urgent or insatiable
Craves specific “comfort” foods, often high in sugar, fat, or carbs
Wants immediate relief
Leaves you feeling guilty, ashamed, or out of control afterwards
Physical hunger tends to:
Build gradually
Be satisfied by a range of foods
Ease when you’ve eaten enough
Leave you feeling neutral or content
Neither is “bad” — but confusing the two can disconnect us from the body’s natural signals over time.
What emotional eating can look like
Emotional eating is deeply individual. There is no single pattern, and no universal trigger. What matters isn’t what you eat, but why and how you’re eating.
Some common signs include:
Eating in secret or only when alone
Eating foods alone that you wouldn’t eat with others
Hiding wrappers or packaging
Feeling guilt, shame, anxiety, or powerlessness around food
Swinging between overeating and restriction
Digestive discomfort, poor sleep, or weight fluctuations
For some people, emotional eating shows up as eating more. For others, it shows up as eating less — restricting or controlling food when emotions feel too much.
Both are ways of managing feelings.
Why it’s not a willpower problem
Emotional eating is often misunderstood as a lack of discipline or “bad habits.” In reality, it’s usually a coping strategy— one that made sense at some point.
Food can become a reliable way to self-soothe, especially when other forms of nourishment are missing. Loneliness, stress, unmet needs, lack of rest, or emotional support can all drive us toward food for comfort.
This is why quick fixes rarely work. Emotional eating isn’t solved by cutting out sugar or adding more vegetables. If it were that simple, most of us would have figured it out by now.
A more compassionate way forward
Emotional eating disconnects us from ourselves — from hunger and fullness cues, from emotional awareness, and from self-trust. Rebuilding that connection starts with curiosity rather than judgment.
When you begin to ask:
What am I really hungry for right now?
What feeling might be underneath this urge to eat?
What does my body actually need in this moment?
…you start to shift the relationship, not just the behaviour.
Emotional eating is something I return to again and again in my own work — in my writing, my teaching, and my personal practice. It’s nuanced, deeply individual, and rarely solved with quick fixes.
If this article resonates, you’ll find more reflections on mindful eating, emotions, and the body throughout my writing here, on my podcast and on my instagram where these themes often surface in conversation.
And occasionally, when it feels like the right fit, I work 1:1 with clients who want support exploring their relationship with food in a more mindful, compassionate way - so feel free to reach out if this feels like you.